When the break is nearing its end..

Last Sunday, the day denoting the end of the so many months of break.

Had an afternoon of young adults fellowship fellowship at Singapore Botanical Garden after church service. Had singspiration, culinary competition and games over at the place. Seriously, the freaking hot weather almost had us all killed or at least, me. I pity those polar bears at the north pole fixing their eyes on the melting of ice everyday. The weather has been so inconsistent these days, who knows some day Singapore and Malaysia might even experience snow.

Though the weather's hot, I have got the chance to see my equally phenomenon over at the Botanical Garden, dogs :) The place has always been a heavenly location for dogs and their owners.

After the outing, we went to cck's mcdonalds and dipped ourselves in coffee a bit while waiting for Gabriel to watch Fast and Furious 4. The movie was good but somehow, it is the continuation of Fast and Furious 2. The third one, Tokyo Drift just popped out of nowhere. Anyway, it was good so.

Monday, the start of a tight schedule again. Being the first day, I went into the new class W55L and had Recombinant DNA Technology for the day. My new teammates were all fun people. And being so lucky, Raden was in the same team as me. The same year 1 sem 1 classmate, and now, being in the same class in year 2 again and the first day of school, being in the same team as me. We were reminded that this module would be the hardest one and the one with the most lab sessions. I couldn't just rest on my laurels.

Today, wednesday which is my day off. I have no modules for today. I stayed in my hostel for the morning, with my theory of music papers in front of me. I had to study the italian terms and memorise them for the exam. I had no time to waste. My exam would be due soon in May. So many months have passed already, and now there's just only a few weeks more to go before the real one. I have to get working on and stuff them all inside my mind. I could put it aside once my exam is over. :)

Nail is driven over by nail; Habit is overcomed by habit.

A very pathetic attempt.

The New Lair Transformation

Day 0
- Moving in into the empty lair. My new room or at least, my site of the room is completely empty. Completely empty and white except the air which claimed its existence in the room. Started packing right after that with Esther to help.

7pm
Everything was almost complete with all things in place except some of those. Went out for dinner and shopping for necessities.


Day 1
- Everything was is its place on day 1. With some furniture shopping needed to complete the lair. Lair was in good condition.

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More furniture shopping at IKEA with Esther, Yap Fook Lim and Chu Ting Feng (Jasnie's little brother)

Day 3

- Complete with the bed keeper!

Lair is in perfect condition.

A tough one

Just two rows ahead of me.
That was the last moment.
I remembered when my roving eye is caught by a row of blinding white teeth against the chocolate-brown of a familiar face.
There's more to this face than meets the eye.



Touched down Singapore again yesterday. And right after the arrival I had tons of things to do. My heart leaped that day in Sandakan when my phone rang and an international ID appeared on the caller ID. I didn't know whether to put a big satisfaction smile on my face or to add it on to my worries. It was really a tough decision for me. It was the fear of the same condition as the old one which brought me to that stage. But if I don't give it a try, I'll never know. Deep inside, I wish I would never ever regret on hitting that 'reply all' button on the Outlook mail. But if it happens to be a regret, it will be only for two more whole years.

It wasn't an easy one, of recouping of the new environment again after so many months of all the comfort at home even that the break is just a bliss. There's no place like home. Even that you know it's only a few months before you'll be heading back again, there's still misses nailed deep inside which is sufficient to suffocate you for maybe days or even weeks.

I'm lucky enough to have Esther to go on the packing together. I would have broke down trying to tidy and pack all those stuff in my room alone. Even packing together, I felt worn out. The feeling of just wanting to stay put in one place. Without Esther I wouldn't be able to put my head on my pillow early last night.

Like suddenly I was thinking that why could someone have just live on easily in a new environment while others just couldn't take it. It is what it's called homesickness i guess. Sometimes I do envy classmates where they could pursue further studies by staying right put in Singapore, future bright painted ahead in Singapore. If only renowned colleges and universities do exist in Sandakan, then we wouldn't have to go on separate ways far away to pursue what we wanted. Yea, sounds corny. As I grow up, the real world surrounded me with more mundane concerns than being indulged in the universe in stories.

Thank the Lord that everything went well. I didn't need to bear with my neighbour's stentorian play-by-play again.
May I be able to build a strong foundation here again to last for at least till the next break.

Till the corners of the earth

I followed my parents to Sandakan Yatch Club the other day. Daddy had to take care of something and so mummy and I waited at its pier, we were just right above the spot where boats would be sliding down in trolleys from the land to be encompassed by the sea water. That is also the same spot where those who are going for a fishing trip would have a dopamine rush. I have once had that rush when I followed my daddy out for a fishing trip.

While we were there, my eyes were caught by the yatch with a Canadian flag raised high up on its edge. The fact that a yatch sailing all the way here to Sabah from Canada didn't hit me. I thought it was just some random people who raised a Canadian flag out of love for the country or at most, a Canadian who bought a yatch here in Sabah because a yatch here would have cost him tons cheaper! Okay, maybe not that cheap but still we're talking about Sabah! People would have develop a love for Sabah because of its cheaper stuff. Hah

But I went down to yatch club again last night to see another yatch, and this time a Sweden flag on it. I then saw two couples being tanned all head-to-toe having the complexion of coppertone, an older couple sitting on one side of the table facing another couple but younger around their 30s. I was told then that they both have been sailing all the way from their own country, across the ocean.

Imagine how much of your courage it takes up for you to have sailed all the way from your own country to Sabah. The couples were the only ones in their yatchs, no more and no less. Their journeys weren't blocked by the raging seas nor did they put their quests into a halt when the ocean throws a fit. The older couple from Canada happen to ask the location of the computer room as they wanted to know the condition of their family through technology. The man even had an artificial leg on one side and he was limping. This adds on to my awe! How great their desires are.

Tell me how many of us asians would do that. The western ways of thinking clearly separated their decisions while the eastern ways of thinking would be always to balance decisions in a yin and yang fashion, weighing the consequences of each decision. I think quest like this wouldn't allow undecisive characteristics. The couple also told us that they are in pursuit of their dreams, to travel around the whole world. They took 14 long years just to travel half the world! 14 whole years! It's really a long long period. You could earn a lot in 14 years! You could even earn yourself a Permanent Head Damage in 14 years! You could mould a child in 14 years! You could spend time shopping for material things that you always crave for in 14 years! But neither Dick of Harry could stop them from their quest. It's much more valuable than any other stuffs. They are now starting to travel the other half, completing what they have always wanted.

All of these brings me down to one point.

You don't have to earn the whole world! If you think you have earn enough, just go ahead and enjoy.

Session of goodbyes

Had a quick meet up for a drink the other night with the girls due to that it would be my last week in Sandakan. Also same to Esther. Jeanette drove me there together as well.

We had long talks of course and session of updates which after the late night started to draw in, we bidded each other goodbyes.

Jeanette also drove me back home and handed me an early birthday gift and a card before I left. After so many years since we were in primary school, she is still the same old Jeanette, so keen of making special birthday cards. :)

Life's like that. We bid each other hellos but we also have to bid each other goodbyes. I guess it would be a period of time before we could meet up again.

Jeanette:. Thank you for the wonderful little gift and birthday card! They're awesome! And

also your early birthday wish before it is even my birthday. It means a lot. Thank

youuuu as always! :)

Khar Wei:. Take care aight. Thank you for helping me out during these days. I'll be seeing you

again very soon! I still have many slots of break to go. :D And remember to keep me

updated often also. :)

Esther:. Of course I'll be meeting you again in a few days!:D We'll be flying off together! See

youuuu:)

Love,

Megan

To see You high and lifted up

My longest break is nearing its end soon. So much of this break with its contents moulded bit by bit, and held securely in it surely tantalized me. The thought of that I will be going back to Singapore for studies soon makes my feelings inside fluctuate. I can view that as dating in two parts. A part of me feels heavy to leave this place so greatly nailed in me, the place where my home is, of the great food both at home and out, while the other part is anxiously awaiting to go back. It has been months since I last saw and went out for shoppings and outings with my fellow W15Hs and W26Ls. It has been some time since we are both sending each other offline messages, Sibelle Ng Si Ying and me, due to the the different timing of us going online. She has work during the day so that she won't be able to go online. And speaking of Edna, who has been disappearing for a week if I am not mistaken! And Vivian and Sam! Also Anne, Jasmine, monkey Ed, sj and so on..

I have been missing so much of our class outings. Previously the W15Hs who had outing together and today! the W26Ls having steamboat for dinner! Ah ah ah! Dengkai has been so good telling me the details of the place of the steamboat, showing me the website of the place and the location to come to the conclusion that I wouldn't be able to join unless I swim back. Righttt.

I went over to my grandpa's place that day to realise that he has grown so old over the years, which I didn't even realise. Is there a fact that when a person grows old, he'll change? I don't mean the the physical part. That cannot be denied. His look has grown so weary over the years. In fact, his inside changed as well, he has grown to not be able to differentiate whether what he did was right or wrong. Maybe I should say that his mind is not in a conscious state of what he is doing. And previously, my cousins and I myself got angry at him because of a dog. Well, I shall not spilt out here what he did to it.

That day, my po po told me that my uncle would be coming back all the way from Canada to have our family portrait taken. The last one we had was when I was eleven. She said she doesn't know when my grandpa will be leaving us with his current health. He has been complaining of the tremendous amounts of medicine that he has to take everyday.

I felt the sudden loneliness in him. I knew he still love us all. Recalling back, I still remember when he fed me my first 'teh c' when I was still a toddler, of how he drove me out when I said I wanted to go out. I know we shall bear with him while we can.

Game of content?

I happen to follow daddy and mommy to SYC, Sandakan Yatch Club for a dart competition. Daddy was the one who was joining the dart competition. I was witnessing the whole game, well not really the whole game. The whole thing comprises of three rounds, and a single round would be around an hour an a half only! The game started only at 8.30pm after our dinner there. So when the second round of the competition was in its midst, mommy drove me home first cause it was late and there was still another round and a half more to go. Just by watching them play, I knew it would be a hard game. I was even not sure whether I could be that accurate every round. The posture alone for the dart throwing makes me feel as if I'm the one having backache from that posture!

Well, I didn't quite get the actual rules of that game, but I know it is another sport which alcohol improves. Ask why, and I would say it's because whisky is set on the table. And the content of that whisky bottle, with the 'Johnnie Walker Black Label Old Scotch Whisky' on it poured into a few glasses. Uncles and daddy used to have a few sips on their whisky before their turns. And somehow I had the feeling that it greatly improves their accuracy! I don't know why.

The dartboard with those darts reminds me of how we had our very first few physics lessons. I remembered clearly that it was printed in the first two chapters of the secondary school physics textbook. I had a vivid recollection of that lesson, both in school and in my physics tuition. Diagrams of the dartboard and darts were used to illustrate the meaning of accuracy and consistency in the introduction chapter to physics.

This led my thoughts to that physics wouldn't be appearing in my modules starting this academic year. I would be in second year in around two weeks and we will be focussing purely in our course. No more Contemporary Issues in Culture and Aesthetics, not Introduction to Communication, no more Enterprise Skills neither do Cognitive Processes, like what we had during our first year.

A224-Recombinant DNA Technologies
A223-Biochemistry
A221-Microbiology
A201-Applied Chemistry I

I will be sticking to these modules until the end of the semester.

I should be thankful to be engaged in this wild and crazy ride. ;)

Lust

Did I reveal that I am likely to be standing on the other side of my decision after a while (maybe a few weeks), when I first made my decision thinking that I'm fully supportive and happy with the decision that I made. Darn! Which means that I'm indecisive when it comes to material things.

That single item which previously managed to secure a place at the top of my wishlist would easily be that item which lost to capture my heart fully and forever. An item which when I first saw it, I said "I'm positive about getting it" would turn to be "I'd wish I got the other one" after some time. Just like how daddy got me the Pink Vaio in the first place when I fixed my eyes on it. Now I wanted a Mac Notebook. The same goes to the Samsung Omnia phone when I said I wanted a touch screen phone. I was previously so into it. But after listening to my brother whine about how irresistable the iphone is and the constant carrying of his ipod everywhere, playing with it and listening to the songs held inside the just the thin device, my desire is inclining towards the iphone now!

Nah, I'm just spilling out my desires here. I shall keep the addicted-to-new-stuff-bug bite in me.

For the lust of the eye, the lust of the heart or even the lust of the mind shall be kept inside us right.

I do really have an enviable lust. Righttt ;D

I just have this addicted-to-new-stuff-bug bite but
I wouldn't let bed bugs bite!

Hitting my dreams on bed soon:)

Shun this way

Alas. The longer I stay back in my hometown here, the more I would want it to remain this way. Staying this way, I'm not being any productive than ever nor am I doing anything constructive. Well, most of the time. I do shed in some of my time to make sure that all of my theory exercises given have been completed before it is due. I also do keep my hands on the piano occasionally so that I do not get rusty on it neither would I want to be mumbled only to do so. That's why I'm choosing to make the move first.

I don't know whether I have really messed up all the dates or that the passing time has blindfolded my consciousness. I even forgot myself the date that I'm flying back. I thought I will be flying on the 16th April but it turned to be that the exact date is 15th April.

Well thank God that I have a mother who stays clear and thoughtful all the time. Every single detail of the flight printed on the itenerary is in her head. Or else, I would have missed the flight and thereafter, would have to resort to swimming back. Just a way of getting back right (though not possible). I wouldn't want to miss the first day of the semester.

Shall I say I am fortunate enough or what. I'm grouped to be in the same class as Raden again. He was in the same class as me in the very first semester of Year 1. Knowing him, he sure is a joker! Furthermore, changes have been done to the academic policies and regulations which means that everything is different from before. Well, classes as usual but Understanding Tests and calculations have been modified and reinforced so that students have no chance of resorting to the 'Missing In Action.' Righttt, how thoughtful they are. All my modules are in the B group and so classes for me starts at 9.15am from now on. Just raising my hopes that everything goes well. I'm sure that the two more years for me will just be gone like a swift bird so that I am a step nearer to what I dreamt of.


Hear me out,
I shall try to shun the tele a while, just to prove that this separation anxiety doesn't exist. :)